I'm Barack Obama, And I Approve THESE Smears

Can we take this as conclusive proof that The One does not get frightened at the guy who stares back at him in the bathroom mirror every morning?:

Well, how about Governor Palin? She’s you know, an up and comer from Alaska.

And because of her, you're well on your way to being a down & outter from Illinois.  I wouldn't want to belittle you by suggesting you might be just a smidgen jealous, but the combination of green and....naw, I wouldn't want to make David Patterson's wet dreams come true.

She - they’re starting to run an ad now saying she opposed the bridge to nowhere....

....Well now, let’s get the facts clear here....

[SNORT] Geez, Barry, can't you WARN me when you're going to crack impromptu one-liners?  Now I've gotta go get the Windex and a washcloth.

When she was mayor, she hired a Washington lobbyist to get earmarks - pork barrel spending - all the things that John McCain says is bad, she lobbied to get! And got a whole lot of it. When it came to the bridge to nowhere, she was for it until everybody started raising a fuss about it and she started running for governor and then suddenly she was against it!

You remember that? For it before you were against it? I mean you can’t just make stuff up. You can’t just recreate yourself. You can’t just reinvent yourself. The American people aren’t stupid.

 ....As you appear to think we are.  What troubles you about Governor Palin's "shrinkage in office," Lucifer?  Its ideological direction, that she beat you to it, or the fact that hers is genuine and yours is phonier than a Bill Clinton alibi - and on so much more than just pork?

Why do you have such a bug up your ass about this lady, Teacher, when she's not even your opponent - and THAT geezer's earmark cherry really is still unpopped.  And, of course, your own running mate is filthier than Mike Rowe.  Is it any wonder that the Mavericks are as marveling at the ledgerdemain of your campaign strategizing as we are?

Must be a pretty big ass bug, too.  At least your "instant response" spot mentions McCain.  Way to get him back in the game, Barry!:

Um, O Bread Of Death, didn't you officially pierce your staff lobbyist maindenhead just last month?  Doesn't your spot concede that Barracuda ended up against the "bridge to nowhere", which you and Rogaine stuck behind even instead of redirecting the funds to relief for Hurricane Katrina victims?  And, er, your opponent isn't President Bush, either.  As a matter of fact, he's not even on the ballot.

Maybe if you didn't have such a neurotic case of Maverick-envy, you'd notice the degree to which your running mate is sawing your political legs off at the knees almost as effectively as you are:

Er, yeah, Joe, the Administration that put more women and minorities in top Cabinet positions than any of its predecessors is just oozing with racism and mysogeny.  And the party that has plumbed the depths of sexism and women-hatred in the past ten days at the spectre of the first female vice president in American history being a conservative Republican is the only vehicle for moving the fairer gender forward....in enforced lockstep.  In short, it doesn't matter if Sarah Palin has two X-chromosomes, two breasts, a well-used reproductive system, and the stretch marks to show for it, she's not a "true woman" because she's not a feminazi.

Just as she is some sort of flat-earth cave-dweller because she is no more willing to destroy viable human embryos for no valid medical reason than she is in utero children with "special needs":

Was Joe Biden referring to Sarah Palin, a mother of a child with Down syndrome, when he made this comment?

“I hear all this talk about how the Republicans are going to work in dealing with parents who have both the joy, because there’s joy to it as well, the joy and the difficulty of raising a child who has a developmental disability, who were born with a birth defect. Well guess what folks? If you care about it, why don’t you support stem cell research?”

Biden received a thunderous ovation when he made the remark at a town hall style meeting this morning in Columbia.

Er, Joe, the Governor DOES support stem cell research - ADULT stem cell research, which has produced dozens of viable treatment therapies.  So does one of your running mate's imaginary opponents, President Bush, who was the first president to authorize federal funding for such research.  It's funding for embryonic stem cells, which are as medically worthless as their destruction is pointlessly and morally abhorrent, that she rightly opposes.

Why do you people keep going back to this dry well?  To rebuild False Messiah's idol by depicting him like a Hinnesque faith healer?  After the beating he took at Saddleback last month, is that really a topic you want to send him back to?

And to think that this is what passes for Team Hussein's "high road".  We can debate how many degrees of separation exist between the sainted figure who proclaimed both tickets' families "off limits" while uttering nary a peep as the category 5 slimeicane from the leftosphere and Enemy Media descended on Sarah Palin with a fury like this country has never witnessed (and is far from exhausting itself).  But that levee is, shall we say, experiencing "progressive failure":

There’s been a spurt of 527 activity on behalf of Senator John McCain, but Barack Obama campaign has suddenly gone silent on the subject.

That’s because, after of year of telling donors not to contribute to 527 groups, of encouraging strategists not to form them and of suggesting that outside messaging efforts would not be welcome in Obama’s Democratic Party, Obama’s strategists have changed their approach.

An Obama adviser privy to the campaign’s internal thinking on the matter says that,with less than two months before the election and with the realization that Republicans have achieved financial parity with Democrats, they hope that Democratic allies — what another campaign aide termed “the cavalry” — with come to Obama’s aid.

And we all know how FAIR and RESPONSIBLE lefty 527s are, don't we?

But they do raise a lotta cash, though.  Of which The Golden Child suddenly finds himself in acute need:

After months of record-breaking fund-raising, a new sense of urgency in Senator Barack Obama’s fund-raising team is palpable as the full weight of the campaign’s decision to bypass public financing for the general election is suddenly upon it.

Pushing a fund-raiser later this month, a finance staff member sent a sharply worded note last week to Illinois members of its national finance committee, calling their recent efforts “extremely anemic.” …

The signs of concern have become evident in recent weeks as early fund-raising totals have suggested that Mr. Obama’s decision to bypass public financing may not necessarily afford him the commanding financing advantage over Senator John McCain that many had originally predicted.

It is to laugh.  Once again, Barry's head crowds everything else out of the proverbial room - in this case, his pocketbook, which is shrinking to accomodate it.  If he'd simply kept his promise to stay within the public financing system, he'd have the same $84 million McCain got for nothing.  Instead even his campaign's most optimistic estimates between now and November reach no higher than the seventy million-plus range, and at the rate BO's campaign fortunes are deflating, they may well take in a lot less.  Plus he's got to rain-make on a daily basis as well as purely campaign, while Sailor can focus entirely on making him look like an even bigger fool than he's made himself look like already.  And even if Team Messiah exceeds those expectations, their chronic profligacy takes considerable bang out of all those bucks.

Still, fundraising is nothing more than a political barometer in counterpoint to polling.  A leading indicator, as it were.  Which makes the causal correlation with Slimeicane Sarah very telling indeed.

UPDATE: Obamaversy of the day:

Did The Chosen One not-so-surreptitiously call Governor Palin a pig?  AP says no, Hugh Hewitt says yes.

I think it was another of his classic gaffes.  We all know what a godawful off-the-cuff speaker Barack Hussein Obama is.  From his reference to "fifty-seven states" at the start of the summer to his telling a crowd how happy he was to be in "New Pennsylvania" yesterday, The Chief Stumbling Block's verbal incontinence when unaccompanied by a teleprompter defies description.

Picture the setting.  There stands the Donk nominee in the townhall setting that will be the death of his candidacy.  He's trying to make the point that McCain-Palin don't really represent "change," in the sense that they don't represent partisan change.  He mentally flails for a witty metaphor and sees the common aphorism all we "bitter clingers" would probably toss off the top of our heads in his place.  For his immediate purposes it serves him adequately.

But, being The One, Governor Palin's convention speech line about the difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull being "lipstick" completely evaded his rhetorical filters.  His slow-as-molasses synapses, laserly focused on trying to depict the Mavericks as identical Bush twins, never connected those contextual dots, and therefore gave not even seat-of-the-pants consideration to the inevitable way his listeners would hear his ill-chosen words.

When I first heard the clip, I burst out laughing, because it sounded like he'd blunderingly stepped on another PR rake, this one the size of a telephone pole.  Having listened to the clip several more times, that's still my conclusion.

And remember: that's what constitutes giving BO the benefit of the doubt.

UPDATE II: Here's the real punchline:

Anyone wanting a Hillary vs. Sarah smackdown might be in for a letdown. First, Sarah Palin launched her Republican vice presidential campaign with praise for the strides made by Hillary Rodham Clinton in her quest for the Democratic presidential nomination. On Monday, Clinton spoke in kind.

"It is a great accomplishment," Clinton said of Palin's selection as the GOP's first female running mate. Clinton told a rally of five hundred that the election will be decided on issues, not the historical significance of the candidates, and Democrat Barack Obama and his running mate Joe Biden bring more to the table than the Republican ticket.

"Women as well as men make their decisions after they weigh the evidence," Clinton said. "As Americans go into that voting booth, what they have to ask themselves is not so much who am I for, as who is for me? And I don't think it's an even close question that we have the ticket that is going to do the best job in restoring the American promise."

About the most she'd say about Palin is that she and Republican presidential candidate John McCain "are not the change that we need."

Looks like that kamikaze run the Unholy One is looking for may not be so easily come by.

You can just hear the silent cackling, cantcha?

UPDATE II: I don't think Obama is stupid enough to publicly call Sarah Palin a "pig".  I think he's intelligent enough to recognize that the quickest way to get this pointless anchor dragging down his campaign out from around his scrawny neck is to go before his press sychophants and fall on his sword.  Say something like, "Uh, you know, uh, uh, my choice of metaphor yesterday in, uh, trying to make the point that John McCain, uh, and Sarah, uh, Palin don't represent, uh, real change was thoughtless and, uh, ill-considered.  I should, uh, have realized that the lipstick part of the, uh, reference would make, uh, people think of, uh, Governor Palin's acceptance speech.  It truly was, uh, not my intent to lob so coarse and, uh, juvenile an insult at her, and, uh, I deeply apologize, uh, to the Governor and, uh, anybody else who took it, uh, in that, uh, way."

Unfortunately for him, his colossus of an ego has his mental acuity in a permanent full nelson.  Thus does pride render The One a cosmic dumbass, and bury, uh, Barry under another avalanche of those "distractions" he dislikes so much - and which the rest of us know as accountability.